Obsession to youtube

A friend told me, nahhhh This is your song. I was like WTF... and she said. you should read the lyrics. Its fits you. and the words kinda stucked in my head.

When you lower me down
So deep that I, I can?t get out
And when you're lost, lost and alone
Yes, you'd think it was the last place
You'd come back for more

If you don?t want me to leave
Then don't push me away
You'd rather blow out the lights
You can watch it all fade
But I'm going nowhere

I'm gonna stay
When you just wanna fight
When you're closing your eyes
Cause you don't wanna love me

I'm gonna stay
You can't push me too far
There's no space in my heart
Where I don't wanna love you

And when there's no, no storm
Then how can I feel the calm?
If there's nothing, nothing, nothing left to lose
Then what is this feeling
That keeps on bringing me back to you

So I'm gonna stay
When you just wanna fight
And you're closing your eyes
Cause you don't wanna love me

So I'm gonna stay, yes I will
You can't push me too far
There's no space in my heart
Where I don't wanna love you

If you ask me to leave
And I walked away
We'd still be alone
And we'd still be afraid
I'm going nowhere
I'm going nowhere

Cause I'm gonna stay
When you just wanna fight
And there's tears in your eyes
Cause you don't wanna love me

I'm gonna stay
All the tears that I've cried
I could leave them to dry
If you don't wanna love me
I could leave them to dry
If you don't wanna love me

Youtube!

Stumbled upon this video on 1.23am. Loved em so much. Simple setups and simple lyrics. Direct!

Blood Red Shoes - I Wish I Was Someone Better

Made a mistake
I made a mistake
I wear the scars to show my shame

Made a mistake
I made a mistake
I wear the scars to show my shame

What should I do?
What should I do?
When I'm the one who can't get through

What should I do?
What should I do?
When I'm the one hey, I'm the one to blame.

I (woo ooh oo)
Can't (woo ooh oo)
See (woo ooh oo)
Past (woo ooh oo)
This (woo ooh oo)
Chance (woo ooh oo)
For us to (woo ooh oo)
Reconcile these doubts! (woo ooh oo)
They've all (woo ooh oo)
Gone on (woo ooh oo)
For far too long (woo ooh oo)
Yeah it goes on and on and on and on (woo ooh oo)
On and on and on and on (woo ooh oo)

Made a mistake
I made a mistake
I wear the scars to show my shame

Made a mistake
I made a mistake
I wear the scars to show my shame

What should I do?
What should I do?
When I'm the one who can't get through

What should I do?
What should I do?
When I'm the one hey, I'm the one to blame.

Just (woo ooh oo)
Not (woo ooh oo)
Built (woo ooh oo)
For (woo ooh oo)
This (woo ooh oo)
Role (woo ooh oo)
And all the time (woo ooh oo)
Much better spent(woo ooh oo)
But it all drags on for far too long (woo ooh oo)
And it drags on and on and on and on
On and on and on and on

Made a mistake
I made a mistake
I wear the scars to show my shame

Made a mistake
I made a mistake
I wear the scars to show my shame

What should I do?
What should I do?
When I'm the one who can't get through

What should I do?
What should I do?
When I'm the one hey, I'm the one to blame.

I wish I was someone better x14

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In A way, I'm confused, puzzled and indecisive lately. Too many things happen and too many outcome. Its down to few options now. All are making me indecisive & I cant really think straight right now. If im too bold, im afraid that im end up with the wrong decision. If I just continue with it, it will kinda make me look greedy. I don't want to look greedy. Ahhhh sometimes its just.....

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Too many things happens in too short time. I hate it when i really need to choose. Really I am. Im not a risk taker like other people. Sometimes Im kinda a risk management thinggy. I deliberate all the outcomes, the pro & cons while I cant make anydecision. Usually Abang is the bolder one who will make all the decision. Im afraid of breaking others people's heart. I kinda have felt it, and i try not to do it to other people.....

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But keeping things the way there are, makes me even a greedy and kinda look like king control. Damn I aint gonna waste my time and money and end up making people happy and at the end, i would take all the suffering. ARRRGGHGHGGHHGHH

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Damn shall I remove my business partner or just let him has a free ride through life.......... that's a riddle i have to solve by myself !

Reminiscing the past year

I think its almost a year now. I dont know why are "gatal" hands went browsing through the net and stumble upon your blog. I was reluctant to read the entries but well im human, the inappropriate things are the best thing to do aite. Damn you Satan! The last entry was on February. Hurm the last time you contacted me and I kinda let you down. Well after reading your blog, hurm i kinda realize how cruel I am, It remind me how cruel I was to you. Really. and one thing did came up right, I did face the same thing. Its Karma right? I hope you are satisfy. You want to know what made me wanna break? In my side of story? Here goes; the main reason is you cant mix around with my families and friends. When you lost your temper, you lost your respect. You were too eager to look for my wrong doings. Everything I did was like I was betraying you or a big sin to you. I cant work I cant socialize even I lost my friends. Everyday with ya is like im starting a rebellion. Hurm naaah Its history but I need to let it out, somehow.

I cant deny how you took care of me. You were very caring, that I cant deny but somehow I cant commit. Been telling myself to be grateful for the past 3 years we were together but I kept on have the rebellious feelings. I did have the heart to tell you the truth, I dont want you to get more devastated as you were having family problems too. I do understand. So I use the lame break up line. "Its not you, Its me" "You are too good for me, theres someone more better for you out there" "I'm having a relationship with ab-someone who you hates and envy" Im sorry, I had to do it. I guess you are happy now. Good for you. I"ll pray for your happiness.

SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BE CRUEL TO BE KIND

You Have Been Served

Somebody call, "You have been served. Please be in court 21 June 2010"

I was stunned until i do not know what to do. The last thing I heard was the buzzing from the phone cause i didn't hang up.

What a fucking bloody Monday.

Sigh...